20th Century Fox Television/ CBS
How I Met Your Mother remains one of the most relatable TV series when it comes to relationships, friendships, và trying to navigate your life between your twenties & thirties, & then forties.
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Over its nine-season span, the show gave us memorable & instantly-classic quotes that ranged from funny one-liners that made us LOL to sound relationship advice that touched our hearts. In fact, the show was responsible for some of the funniest phrases in recent sitcom history.
20th Century Fox Television/ CBS“Somewhere along the line, I forgot khổng lồ pursue my dream, và now I’m old, và I’m a mom, & it’s just too late for me.” — Lily Aldrin“Whether a gesture’s charming or alarming depends on how it’s received.” — Ted Mosby“Lily, there are a million reasons why I love you. You make me laugh, you take care of me when I’m sick, you’re sweet, caring & you even created an egg dish and named it after me. She puts a little Italian dressing on the eggs before she cooks them, it’s called Eggs Marshall and it’s awesome. But the main reason is you’re my best friend, Lily. You’re the best friend I’ve ever had.” — Marshall Eriksen“If I ask you lớn change too many things about yourself, you’re not gonna be the man I fell in love with. Turns out I accept và appreciate even the grossest, creepiest, most sociopathic parts of you.” — Robin Scherbatsky“Maybe this isn’t a breakup. Maybe this is just two friends getting back together.” — Barney Stinson“Definitions are important.” — Lily Aldrin“I really don’t lượt thích feelings.” — Robin Scherbatsky“I’m cuddly. Giảm giá with it.” — Marshall Eriksen“The only reason to wait a month for sex is if she’s 17 years, 11 months old.” — Barney Stinson“Shouldn’t we hold out for the person who doesn’t just tolerate our little quirks, but actually kind of likes them?” — Ted Mosby“We spend an hour arguing about where to eat, và we over up here, anyway. I haven’t eaten for two days. Can we please, for the love of God, just order something now?” — Robin Scherbatsky“I’m a good boyfriend in my sleep.” — Marshall Eriksen“Believe it or not, I was not always as awesome as I am today.” — Barney Stinson“Some couples always support each other, and some couples always challenge each other. But is one really better than the other? Yes. Support is better. Way better.” — Future Ted Mosby“I don’t know where I’m gonna be in five years. I don’t wanna know. I want my life to lớn be an adventure.” — Robin Scherbatsky“You have khổng lồ let me dance my own battles.” — Marshall Eriksen“I used khổng lồ be in such a hurry all the time. Everything was so urgent. Now I figure, if it’s going lớn happen, it’ll happen when it happens. I’m not going anywhere; she’s not going anywhere. What’s the rush, right?” — Ted Mosby“You know what Marshall needs to do. He needs to stop being sad. When I get sad, I stop being sad và be awesome instead. True story.” — Barney Stinson“Oprah wasn’t built in a day.” — Lily Aldrin“If you keep giving up on people so quickly, you’re gonna miss out on something great.” — Robin Scherbatsky“You will be shocked, kids, when you discover how easy it is in life to part ways with people forever. That’s why, when you find someone you want to keep around, you bởi vì something about it.” — Ted Mosby“Death is all around us.” — Marshall Eriksen“Article 24: “When wearing a baseball cap, a Bro may position the brim at either 12 or 6 o’clock. All other angles are reserved for rappers & the handicapped.” — Barney Stinson“The more you fight it, the worse it’s gonna get. It’s lượt thích when your oto slides on ice, you stir into the skid.” — Ted Mosby“I just want khổng lồ say from the bottom of my heart… I’m going to lớn kill you.” — Robin Scherbatsky“You’re my best friend. I don’t need objectivity. I just need your support.” — Lily Aldrin“I thought I saw Big Foot in the park, so I tackled him.” — Marshall Eriksen“Kids, when you’re in a new relationship & you’re competing with your ex for who’s happier, it can get ugly.” — Ted Mosby“Say goodbye khổng lồ all the times you felt lost, lớn all the times it was a No instead of a Yes, lớn all the scrapes & bruises, khổng lồ all the heartache.” — Lily Aldrin“That was the night I was born. I rose lượt thích a phoenix from her mentholated bosom and strode into the world, Armani-clad và fully awesome.” — Barney Stinson“I never wanted that… Of course, it’s one thing not lớn want something; it’s another to lớn be told you can’t have it. I guess it’s just nice knowing that you could someday vì chưng it if you change your mind. But now, all of a sudden, that door is closed.” — Robin Scherbatsky“I’m sorry, when I’m excited I abbreviate words I shouldn’t.” — Ted Mosby“All hail Beercules!” — Marshall Eriksen“You’re in your 40s & you have a playbook. That’s the sad part.” — Lily Aldrin“It’s time to let go of the fantasies. It’s time to lớn grow up.” — Barney Stinson“Why am I constantly looking for reasons not to be happy?” — Robin Scherbatsky“Dude… where’s your suit? Just once, when I say “suit up,” I wish you’d put on a suit.” — Barney Stinson“Happy Slapsgiving!” — Marshall Eriksen“You can’t just skip ahead lớn where you think your life should be.” — Lily Aldrin“If you have chemistry, all you need is one other thing — timing. But timing’s a bitch.” — Robin Scherbatsky“You can ask the universe for signs all you want, but ultimately we’ll only see what we want to lớn see… when we’re ready to lớn see it.” — Ted Mosby“ARTICLE 41 A Bro never cries. EXCEPTIONS: Watching Field of Dreams, E.T., or a sports legend retire.*” — Barney Stinson“Well, that answers all the questions I didn’t ask.” — Robin Scherbatsky“That’s love, bitch.” — Lily Aldrin“The great moments of your life won’t necessarily be the things you do, they’ll also be the things that happen to lớn you.” — Ted Mosby“That’s right, I’m a ghost. I died fifteen years ago, kind of lượt thích that pickup line.” — Robin Scherbatsky“Why say goodbye lớn the good things?” — Lily Aldrin“Here’s the secret kids. None of us can vow lớn be perfect. In the end, all we can vày is promise lớn love each other with everything we’ve got. Because love’s the best thing we do.” — Ted Mosby“I love being the person you bitch to.” — Robin Scherbatsky“Whatever you vày in this life, it’s not legendary, unless your friends are there to lớn see it.” — Barney Stinson“I got a two-syllable ‘damn’ in this dress.” — Lily Aldrin“It’s funny, sometimes you walk into a place, you know you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be.” — Ted Mosby“Nobody asked you, Patrice!” — Robin Scherbatsky“Canada also helped in two world wars & gave the world Neil Young, William Shatner, Leonard Cohen, Pamela Anderson, one-quarter of Barney Stinson, instant mashed potatoes and best of all — you.” — Barney Stinson“Yeah, I wasn’t really listening either. Ted can really go on about a bitch.” — Lily Aldrin“I’m from Minnesota, where there’s plenty of hot-dogs for everyone. Perhaps even too many…” — Marshall Eriksen“Here’s the thing about mistakes: Sometimes, even when you know something’s a mistake, you gotta make it anyway.” — Ted Mosby“Oh, come on, ref! I haven’t seen that much hooking go unpunished since my last trip to lớn Vegas.” — Robin Scherbatsky“Your story is so sweet. You didn’t even kiss ’til the third date. By our third date, I hit more bases than Bob Hope on a USO tour.” — Barney Stinson“Look, you can’t design your life lượt thích a building. You just have to live it…and it’ll kiến thiết itself.” — Lily Aldrin“Italy doesn’t need something that is wrinkled, red and leaky, and smells like booze and narcotics. They’ve already got former Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi.” — Marshall Eriksen“There are two big days in any love story… the day you meet the girl of your dreams… và the day you marry her.” — Ted Mosby“My metabolism is all messed up. See, I can moose down a pint of fudge ripple for a midnight snack and wake up having lost weight. Well, everywhere except for my boobs. So annoying.” — Robin Scherbatsky“The ‘no more surprises’-thing is the best part of being married.” — Lily Aldrin“The biggest case of my life và I’d already lost the jury. I mean, I’ve heard of
Twelve Angry Men, but this was more lượt thích ‘Twelve Horny Women."” — Marshall Eriksen“If you’re not scared, then you’re not taking a chance. If you’re not taking a chance, then what the hell are you doing anyway?” — Ted Mosby“By ‘entertainment’ they mean ‘table-shuffle-board’, macramé classes & other non-stimulating activities which are only used in Manhattan khổng lồ calm down drug-addicts và the criminally insane.” — Robin Scherbatsky“I’m also pleased to lớn announce The Bro Code is now available in select airlines across the country. Và Lufthansa. ‘Der Bro Code’ is, like, huge in Germany.” — Barney Stinson“Yes, I’m in a rotten mood. No, I don’t want to talk about it.
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Yes, this has booze in it. No, it’s not my first.” — Lily Aldrin“One good deed leads to another & another.” — Marshall Eriksen“Love doesn’t make sense. I mean, you can’t ngắn gọn xúc tích your way into or out of it. Love is totally nonsensical, but we have to keep doing it or else we’re lost & love is dead and humanity should just pack it in. Because love is the best thing we do.” — Ted Mosby“Destined? Aren’t you tired of waiting for destiny, Ted? Isn’t it time khổng lồ make your own destiny?” — Robin Scherbatsky“The Bro Code has been around for centuries. Nay… whatever’s more than centuries.” — Barney Stinson“Sometimes we tìm kiếm for one thing, but discover another.” — Barney Stinson“But love doesn’t make sense. You can’t ngắn gọn xúc tích your way into or out of it. Love is totally nonsensical. But we have to keep doing it or else we’re lost and love is dead and humanity should just pack it in. Because love is the biggest thing we do.” — Ted Mosby“I’ve just been handed a news flash, the word Canada is unrhymable.
It’s easier to, I don’t know, get drunk và try khổng lồ climb a bull.But Canada damn it,Ask any man on the planetAnd watch his stammerin’ stamina.As they clamor và cram it into the middle of a sentence,For a shot at repentance,Pass the problem on lớn all their nonrhyming descendants.I’ve never met anyone who could clean up after CanadaExcept my uncle Tony from the BronxHe’s a janitor.” — Gus, aka Lin-Manuel Miranda“I know it’s a mistake, but there are certain things in life where you know it’s a mistake, but you don’t really know it’s a mistake, because the only way to really know it’s a mistake is to make the mistake, và look back and say, ‘Yep, that was a mistake.’ So, really, the bigger mistake would be khổng lồ not make the mistake because then you’d go your whole life not really knowing if something is a mistake or not.” — Lily Aldrin“If you’re looking for a word that means caring about someone beyond all rationality và wanting them to lớn have everything they want, no matter how much it destroys you, it’s ‘love.’” — Ted Mosby“It’s not about proof; it’s about faith. Faith is what gives life shape và meaning.” — Marshall Eriksen“I am Canadian, remember? We celebrate Thanksgiving in October.” — Robin Scherbatsky“Oh right, I forgot. You guys are weird và you pronounce the word ‘out’, ‘oot’.” — Ted Mosby“Look at us, riding around in a limo, eating hot dogs. It’s lượt thích we’re the president.” — Marshall Eriksen“We struggle so hard to lớn hold on khổng lồ these things that we know are gonna disappear, eventually. & that’s really noble.” — Lily Aldrin “It’s going lớn be legen — wait for it — và I hope you’re not lactose intolerant, because the second half of the word is — dary! Legendary!” — Barney Stinson“Just lượt thích Ryan Gosling in The Notebook. It was pretty manly ’til I mentioned Ryan Gosling in The Notebook, huh?” — Ted Mosby“You can ask the universe for signs all you want, but, ultimately, we’ll only see what we want khổng lồ see. When we’re ready khổng lồ see it.” — Ted Mosby“Nothing good happens after 2 a.m. When 2 a.m. Rolls around, just go home and go khổng lồ sleep.” — Ted Mosby“Sorry, Peter. We’re grown-ups now, we can’t fly to Neverland with you anymore.” — Ted Mosby“I wound up shame-eating the whole pizza. I woke up all greasy and sweaty. My sheets looked like what they wrap deli sandwiches in. Maybe I should join a gym. Vì you go to lớn a gym?” — Ted MosbyRobin: “I’m such a mess. Why vị you even lượt thích me?”Barney: “I guess, because you’re almost as messed up as I am.”Barney: “You’re the most awesome person I’ve ever met. Well, second.”Robin: “Right, first being you.”Barney: “No, actually, it’s this guy I know who lives in something called the mirror.”“Eight years ago, I made an ass of myself chasing after you, và I made an ass of myself chasing after you a bunch of times since then. I have no regrets because it led me lớn something I wouldn’t trade for the world; it led to lớn you being my friend. So, as your friend and a leading expert in the field of making an ass of yourself, I say khổng lồ you, from the heart, get the hell out of this car.” — Ted Mosby“OK, here’s my thing — if gay guys start getting married, then suddenly the whole world’s gonna be doing it. That’s how it works: They start something, then six months later, everyone follows. Like… now everyone gets manicures.” — Barney Stinson“There’s three rules of cheating: One — it’s not cheating if you’re not the one who’s married. Two — it’s not cheating if her name has two adjacent vowels. Three — and it’s not cheating if she’s from a different area code.” — Barney Stinson“We’re going to get older, whether we lượt thích it or not, so the only question is whether we get on with our lives or desperately cling to lớn the past.” — Ted Mosby“This isn’t Barney, but I hear that guy’s awesome. All right. Listen very carefully. You will get your stuff back if you are able to lớn complete a series of challenges. Number one, put on the suit. Number two, meet me at MacLaren’s in an hour.” — Barney Stinson“Shut up! Now listen lớn me. The clock is ticking. Okay, first thing, we scoop up all these little pieces of tofu và cabbage.” — Robin Scherbatsk“Kids!? No! Don’t have kids! The rule is no kids until you’re at least 45. Don’t you EVER read my blog? It’s gotten a lot better.” — Barney StinsonLily: “I know what’s bothering you. The cabbie just didn’t look enough like Barney.”Marshall: “Well, that’s just not true.”“The never-ending battle of my life. Career vs. Romance.” — Robin Scherbatsky“Let’s just say there were some senior citizens who attempted lớn “drown” on my watch … and sadly one who did.” — Ted Mosby“Why is Ellen DeGeneres in our bedroom?” — Marshall Eriksen“I can’t wait to tell the gang. This is one of those moments you dream about! Guys… Lily và I… are having unprotected sex. I just got the chills.” — Marshall Eriksen“You guys bangin’? Keep goin’, I’m not even here. But just for the record? Having a baby? Big mistake.” — Barney StinsonWhile How I Met Your Mother is known for its funny antics và hilarious one-liners, it’s the heart of the show that drew fans in over its nine-season run. Luckily, devoted fans have compiled the very best and most emotional moments from the show so we could all shed a few tears together for our favorite characters.“Let’s look at the facts here. You made us sit down and listen lớn this story about how you met Mom, yet Mom’s hardly in the story. No. This is a story about how you’re totally in love with Aunt Robin. Và you’re thinking of asking her out, & you want to know if we’re okay with it.” — Penny MosbyOlder Ted: It was like something out of an old movie. Where the sailor sees the girl across the crowded dance floor và turns khổng lồ his buddy, and says, “See that girl? I’m gonna marry her someday.”Ted: Hey, Barney. See that girl?Barney: Oh, yeah, you know she likes it dirty.“She doesn’t say ‘I love you’ lượt thích a normal person. Instead, she’ll laugh, shake her head, give you a little smile, & say, ‘You’re an idiot."” — Ted Mosby“Being in a couple is hard. & committing, making sacrifices — it’s hard. But if it’s the right person, it’s easy.” — Marshall Eriksen
